Baby Montana

Baby Montana porn! How is it so big? She hasn't gotten a BBL that's for sure. She doesn't strike me as the type to get one. This caboose is bigger than four watermelons smashed together. I haven't seen this huge of an ass in a while. Thick, wide, and pouncable. Lucky Montana, she's got the ass every woman dreams of. With fat ass comes great responsibility. Like having thick thighs to hold all that fat somehow. Not in her case though. Thick thighs are awesome. But a thick ass on slim thighs? Oh mama, be my baby mama.

She loves to pose with her ass in full view on Instagram. It's like an invitation to ram it right in there. Like literally, just a picture of her bending over and showing the beautiful ass right in our faces. Bold move Montana, bold move. She has that kind of ass I want to see all buttered up. Like those videos where they use a lot of oils. I don't quite understand the appeal. It's greasy and messy. I'd rather slide with the help of my own sweat from all the hard fucking. But with an ass like that, yeah. I imagine it all smooth and buttered up, ready for consumption. She'll even get an ass massage from me. I want to enjoy my time with that ass. I would take that ass to Paris and show it the Eiffel tower. We will have a weekend getaway and get as many roses and as much champagne as that ass wants. Montana is great and all. I mean, I haven't checked her enough yet to know about her tits and style of fucking.

But as things stand right now, she can detach her ass and bring it to me. Me and that ass will get married and live happily ever after. We'll have some odd-looking kids, but fuck it. Imagine, little humans with butts as heads. I'd name them poopy and poopoo.

Tits Are Meh

I stand by what I said. I want that ass and only it. I got disappointed with her bazoinkas. They're saggy and have weird nipples. Like, giant nipples, basically covering the whole boob. I ain't into that shit. At least they're big as fuck. When she gets fucked in missionary, they bounce like crazy. Now that's some hot shit. Women with small tits are alright. There's a lot of suckablity potential there. But chick with huge jugs... When they bounce on your cock in cowgirl... That's the fucking dream right there. The most beautiful sight when fucking. Until you turn her around and watch the ass bounce. So in conclusion, Montana needs to bounce on cock a lot. No laying down like a starfish for you, Montana. You need to bounce your best assets for the world to see and enjoy.

She looks like such a cutie patootie. The face of innocence. The girl next door type deal. So refreshing to see. I'm tired of the blown-up lips and nose job look. Those porn stars look the most fuckable on the surface. Everyone likes giant lips and small noses. How else will she pleasure my cock with her mouth if I can't feel the cushion of fat lips on it? But yeah, face value. I'd much rather fuck someone that's generally cute and attractive. Without all the extra dingles and dongles. I like my women natural. The sluttiness comes through when it's needed. When the fucking and sucking is in play. Montana looks like she'd fit right into The Office. Above average looks, an average but hot body, nice smile. She could easily replace Pam. Yeah, that's who she reminds me of, that kind of person. Soft, sweet, quiet. But she won't be too quiet when she's getting dicked. At least I hope so. I'm extra curious about how she acts when her wild side is out since she's so innocent and friendly-looking.

Mediocre Overall

I don't want to throw shade. But I'm here to bring you the honest news. I hope by now, you looked up her ass. That's one piece of yum that's super enjoyable. The rest of her, I'm not too impressed. She's still fuckable. Like come on, she's a woman. My cock is a radar for this shit. I see a woman, I want to smash. So yes, I do want to smash her. But she is low on the list. Plus, I don't even know if she enjoys sex that much. She's a porn star, but I don't see much of performance. She moans, but the look on her face is like she's thinking about her taxes. The only thing you should be thinking about while getting plowed is not thinking. You'll ruin your fun time if you're thinking about the unpaid bills and and if your cat is fed or not. Sadly, that's how a lot of people fuck. Get out of your head and get into that pussy.

Her general looks are nothing to write your bros about. She's a little chubby, but that's not the problem. Chub is good, chub is hot. There are more squishablity options with chub. It's just the way that she's shaped that's throwing me off. Or maybe it's her general demeanor. This guy, in the video I'm watching, is plowing her like there's no tomorrow. She moans and groans, but her face looks bored as fuck. Maybe she should have chosen another career. Like doing taxes for people. Anything that brings her actual joy. Because I'm seeing no joy right now, and my boner has deflated. I should go back and look at her divine ass, maybe that'll help me rise to the occasion. The juices need to be flowing so I manage to finish this review. For now, I'm painfully bored. At least the dude is doing a great job and seems to be having fun. He's getting his dick wet, so why wouldn't he?

Semi-Realistic Porn

Okay, now I get it. I was expecting her to have the porn star look. But she ain't no porn star. She films with her husband. So basically, it's just a couple who get off on sharing their fun sexy time. I can get behind that. They have all the creative freedom and film shit that looks and feels real. I am so tired of the front page Pornhub shit that pops up. They're getting ridiculous. They've even started using fake cum. That porn isn't just boring, it's an insult to the whole industry. There's so much fakeness, that it's hard to enjoy. How can I enjoy choking my chicken when I see that the porn stars aren't enjoying themselves? I've seen dry cock go into dry pussy so often. It's dreadful. There's hardly any foreplay, sucking or licking. My cock needs to rise first before I can jack it. I want to get a stiffy at the same time the dude in the video gets a stiffy. I can surragate myself into him much easier. Then I'll feel like I'm there and fucking some hot ass. But when you just jump into it, I'm not impressed.

Montana and her hubby do it right. There's a lot of licking, fingering, sucking, and whatever else involved. Imagine that. People like it when you touch their naughty bits with your mouths. I swear, it's like some people don't know how to fuck. Just learn from the amateurs. They're realistic. Who knows what young people are learning these days from watching garbage porn. Especially the way choking, spitting, and slapping have become the mainstream now. That used to be part of BDSM and now it's in every normal ass video. Get a grip and lick some pussy before you fuck. And girls, the more you suck it, the more we like it.

Slowly Improving Her Look

She's definitely gotten hotter recently. In her newest Twitter posts, she looks like a different person. Maybe she's gotten a makeover or some shit to get more clicks and more cash. Her fuckablity is slowly but steadily rising. My cock is as well. She's improved her face a lot. No more of the innocent girl next door look for Montana. And she doesn't look like your average annoying-looking slutty girl either. Just generally hotter, for whatever reason. Could be makeup and hair or some shit. I'm not a chick so I wouldn't know. I just wake up and I'm already gorgeous.

Her physique is hotter as well. She's gotten tighter and lighter. Wears sexier lingerie and all that jazz. I have hope for her. Plus, her hubby's got a long shlong so they're both gonna be sex machines in no time. The only thing that hasn't improved is the look of doing taxes in her head face. It's an enigma. She's getting properly plowed with a man she loves and her expression is one of complete boredom. Maybe that's what's realistic? I've got no idea because I haven't seen anything like this before. Montana, learn to give us some spice in your performance.